| Catching up |
[May. 23rd, 2012|02:18 pm] |
The fence vandals got particularly outrageous about a month ago, and cut the bottom two strands of the fence at each and every fence post for the entire perimeter of the fence. I can only hope that they got cramps in their hands from all the work.
It's taken awhile to get the fence repaired; it's probably only a little less expensive repairing such extensive damage than it was to put up the fence in the first place, in materials costs. In terms of labor, it's a lot cheaper, as it only took them two days to repair.
During that time, some people snipped additional holes in the top-most strand as well, allowing them to just ride in on their ATVs, horses, or stride across the land as if they owned it on foot. Also, one enterprising shepherd grazed a couple hundred head of sheep on the land until I asked him to leave.
The fence was repaired last week; SO FAR, it has not been damaged. That will, of course, change.
I have fallen off the medication wagon. I don't know why, probably sheer apathy, but several months ago, I simply stopped taking my meds. When Teresa became concerned, I started taking the Prozac again, although I haven't started taking the others yet.
Unfortunately, 40mg of Prozac is apparently a lot of Prozac to take from a standing start. The last several days have been very unpleasant, with me experiencing many of the side effects they warn you to discuss with your doctor. Dizziness, aches, weakness, feverish, general malaise . . . the list is a long one, and I have a majority of them. Although I'm starting to feel somewhat better, as time goes by and my body once more gets used to the stuff.
Anyone who thinks that depression is just an excuse to get out of work, and that taking the drugs to stave it off is a breeze is a damned fool. They should be condemned to experience it for a full year; the survivors will probably apologize for being such idiots.
About seven weeks ago, during Teresa's mammogram, a lump was detected. After many paperwork delays and an ultrasound examination, a biopsy was performed last week. We were supposed to be informed Monday or Tuesday of the results. As of this hour, I have not heard that they've told Teresa anything.
I was tapped to supply a voice for an audio play some months ago. I haven't recorded my lines yet. Sunday, I was offered an honorable way to back out, and I took it. I hope the production goes well, and regret that I was unable to contribute to it.
Teresa and I now have a dog, a rescue dog that we adopted about two weeks ago. This has proven to be a mixed blessing. She's a loving enthusiastic little thing, though. |
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| Hidden Frontier Productions to return? |
[Apr. 19th, 2012|12:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited | ] | Here's hoping!
Rob put up a sample video on YouTube showing some experiments with 3D technology.
I also posted this on IMDB, in case anyone there is interested in what HFP is doing now.
I miss working on HFP, and hope that we can get back together someday. |
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| I know the feeling |
[Mar. 9th, 2012|01:32 pm] |
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Even though my stalker hasn't planned a wedding, he has several times claimed I'm in love with him. [shudder] If I were gay, wouldn't I show better taste than that? |
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| New Jersey has intimidation laws?! |
[Mar. 2nd, 2012|01:12 pm] |
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Despite the stereotypes, I doubt that New Jersey has any more problems with people performing illegal acts to intimidate and bully others than any other state. So why doesn't California have a statute like New Jersey's? (Be warned, some idiot designer decided that light grey text on a white background could be easily read. Quick trick? Highlight the text for better contrast.) |
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| Help for dyslexics |
[Feb. 16th, 2012|08:13 pm] |
Dyslexia is a brain malfunction that affects a person's ability to read, write, and to understand what others have written. A severe dyslexic can be brilliant and still seem like an illiterate idiot on paper.
According to this article, a Dutch student who is himself dyslexic has developed a font that helps. The font has not been extensively tested, but it has been shown to improve a dyslexic's ability to read, and to UNDERSTAND what they've read.
Our Mad Stalker seems to be dyslexic, and it has been difficult having an online conversation with him, as he frequently has difficulty understanding what I've written. Other times, he'll create a sentence that is pure gibberish and claim that the sentence is clarity itself. Perhaps it IS perfectly clear, to him. It certainly isn't to anyone else I've discussed it with.
The communications gap alone has probably contributed to some of the pointless hostility between us.
It is my hope that information about this educational development gets spread far and wide, because dyslexia is a very difficult condition to live with. I want to help anyone and everyone who suffers from this problem. It may not ease tensions between OMS and myself, but it might. |
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| Spamming in the name of God |
[Feb. 16th, 2012|07:49 pm] |
I have long thought that instead of "freedom of religion", our forefathers should have made it "freedom from religion". They couldn't have, of course: you can't give me freedom from the religion of others without destroying the freedom of religion for others. And much as being harangued by zealots angers me, I have never supported religious tyranny. And whether it's the total suppression of religion in the Communist nations or the total suppression of all OTHER religions as practiced by some people, it is a tyranny.
Still, when I'm in public, I can walk away from a sidewalk preacher. When the tv is tuned to a religious channel, I can change channels. It's harder to avoid something distasteful that's been sent in a mass mailing, especially one that was sent from a government office on the government's time and using a government email account.
That's exactly what happened with this missive:
It doesn’t make any difference whether you go regularly to church or used to go or never went at all, you have to think about God and your future sometimes. You never know when you have to reach out for a friend or family member for help or comfort. Don’t forget about God. He never forgets about you!
Time For God
Read only if you have
time for God
Let me tell you, make sure you read all the way to the bottom. I almost deleted this email but I was blessed when I got to the end
God, when I received this e-mail, I thought...
I don't have time for this... And, this is realy inappropriate during work.
Then, I realized that this kind of thinking is.... Exactly, what has caused a lot of the problems in our world today.
We try to keep God in church on Sunday morning....
Maybe, Sunday night...
We do like to have Him around during sickness....
And, of course, at funerals.
However, we don't have time, or room, for Him during work or play...
Because.. That's the part of our lives we think.. We can, and should, handle on our own.
May God forgive me for ever thinking... That... There is a time or place where...
HE is not to be FIRST in my life.
We should always have time to remember all HE has done for us.
If, You aren't ashamed to do this...
Please follow the directions.
Jesus said, 'If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father.'
Not ashamed?
Yes, .....
I DO Love God.
HE is my source of existence and Savior.
He keeps me functioning each and every day Without Him, I will be nothing. But, with Christ, HE strengthens me. (Phil 4:13)
This is the simplest test.
If You Love God... And, are not ashamed of all the marvelous things HE has done for you...
Send this to other people
Now do you have the time to pass it on?
Make sure that you scroll through to the end.
Easy vs. Hard
Why is it so hard to tell the truth but Yet so easy to tell a lie?
Why are we so sleepy in church but Right when the sermon is over we suddenly wake up?
Why is it so easy to delete a Godly e-mail, but yet we forward all of the nasty ones?
Of all the free gifts we may receive, Prayer is the very best one.....
There are no costs, but wonderful rewards...
GOD BLESS!
Notes: Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Isn't it funny how someone can say 'I believe in God' but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also 'believes' in God). Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing?
Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them
Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.
I pray, for everyone who sends this to their entire address book, they will be blessed by God in a way special for them.
I was inspired to satirize this badly-written drivel. Alas, what started as a satire turned into a polemic, and I may take the time to re-write it later. Even so, those who have seen this version have still had words of praise for it, so I'm going to keep the original, too.
My response:
It doesn't matter if you go skyclad regularly, or used to go skyclad, or just went barefoot in robes, you have to think about God and your future sometime. Under the new religious laws, it's mandatory. But after you've thought about God and shuddered, remember that you never know when you have to reach out to a friend or a family member for comfort. And at such times, don't forget about the Goddess; she hasn't forgotten about you.
Time for the Goddess
Read this only if you have time for the Goddess, like, say, a commercial break during Bridezilla.
Let me tell you, make sure you read all the way to the bottom, bad grammar, poor punctuation, specious logic and all. I almost deleted this email, but hit Reply by accident. I don't feel particularly blessed by having this crap being sent to me on company time, but it would be even worse if it was spammed to my personal emailbox. Couldn't they have sent something uplifting to the soul, instead? Something like a cute picture of a kitten sleeping on a sleeping dog?
Gods and Goddesses, when I received this email, I thought "I don't have time for this. I'm not even religious, let alone a Christian. And this is REALLY inappropriate during work, when even the godly should be rendering unto Caesar that which is Caesar's. And the thought that someone was using government resources to force their beliefs upon me in violation of the First Amendment is truly offensive."
Then I realized that this kind of thinking is exactly what has caused a lot of the problems in our world today. Problems like getting work done, getting paid, spending time with our children, failing to snoop on our neighbors and condemn them for failure to use the missionary position with the man exclusively on top, and women voting.
You try to keep God in church on Sunday morning; maybe, Sunday night, but even He can't stay awake that long. And respectfully we try to keep our beliefs out of your faces, in the so far vain hope that you'll show us the same courtesy . . .
You do like to have Him around during sickness, and of course, funerals. However, you don't have time for Him during work, or play because that's the part of your lives you think you can, and should handle on your own. And you're right. The Gods have always been more interested in helping those who help themselves. Why should the Gods change your diapers when you haven't even tried to change your own first? Even Christianity admits that God gave us free will so that we could be people with the power to change our own lives, instead of robots who aren't even bright enough go around an obstacle when they bump into one.
May the Gods forgive us for ever thinking . . . that . . . there is a time or place where . . . talking like William Shatner . . . is a good idea. And may the Gods forgive us for ever thinking that they are supposed to be FIRST in our lives, more important than food, family, or living. May they forgive us for ever thinking that they want such blind, unthinking obedience from us that we would sacrifice our own children on some tawdry altar for them. May they forgive us for ever believing that the persecution and slaughter of others who think differently than we do could EVER bring us anything but contempt in their eyes.
We should always have time to remember all the hateful things humans have done in the names of the gods, things that they NEVER asked us to do. Burning people alive. Killing others for their land. Enslaving others because their skin color is different, or because we happen to be stronger or more technologically advanced than our victims. Insisting that others treat us better than we treat them. Telling those who have lost loved ones in war, acts of terrorism, or even simple accident that "That was God's plan for them". Nothing brings comfort to the grieving more quickly than telling someone that their loved ones existed solely so they could die horribly for a completely unknown purpose.
If you aren't ashamed to do this (and you probably should be), please follow the directions.
Jesus said 'If you are ashamed of me, I shall be ashamed of you before my Father.' He didn't realize that people were so stupid that he should have added 'If you do shameful things in my name, as if I had asked them of you, my Father and I will both be ashamed of you.'
Still have no sense of shame? Still think that your love of your God requires you to forcibly share Him with everyone, just like some people insist on sharing their music by turning it up so loud that everyone must listen to it?
I'm glad that your God is the source of your existence and your personal Savior. I'm glad that he has the patience and time to keep you functioning each and every day. I'm sorry that you feel that you are nothing without your God; I'm sure he had higher hopes for you than that. I'm glad that your Christ strengthens you in your times of need, just as I have my own resources to help me in my time of need. But this constant hysteria of "My God would be Soooooo much better than your gods, if they even existed" is about as useful as arguing that Chevys are soooo much better than Fords, or that American cars are inherently superior to Japanese or German cars. (Okay, I'll make an exception for Korean-made cars; they are pretty awful, aren't they?)
This is the simplest part of the test: If you think that your God was smart enough to create more than one way to do good, if you think that your God is wise enough to let different people have freedom of choice without damning them for making a choice that isn't the one He picked out for them, if you think that torturing a loyal worshipper (like Job) to force them to prove their loyalty is a monumentally stupid idea, if you think that your God is strong enough and smart enough not to need humans to further His own plans for the universe, then don't send this email to anyone. Give your God the respect He deserves by not forcing His creations to live in a pigeonhole. Give your fellow humans the respect they deserve by not shoving your religion down their throats all the time; free will implies that there is more than one right way to do a job. Give yourself respectability by actually living your faith instead of just talking about it.
If, on the other hand, you think that your God is so narrow-minded that there is only one way to achieve a goal, that He is so weak in appeal that he needs every salesman he can get, if you believe that God genuinely hates some people after claiming to love everyone, if you believe that your God needs your help killing off all of the people He hates, then send this to other people. There is nothing like receiving unwanted spam from you on a subject they are totally uninterested in to completely convince a person that they've been wrong all their lives and that you have all the answers they could never see for themselves.
Now do you have the time to pass it on? Of course you do. You're at work, being paid to do something useful, using someone else's electricity, someone else's computer, someone else's Internet access fees. Just because they pay you to do a job doesn't mean you actually owe them anything, like, perhaps, doing the work they pay you for. And it will be hours before you can get home, when you have more important things to do (like watching Real Housewives of New Jersey), so you have plenty of time to kill, doing stuff like this.
Make sure that you scroll through to the end, because I have a friend in Nigeria who wants to illegally smuggle money out of his country and he needs YOU to do it.
Easy vs. Hard.
"Why is it so hard to tell the truth, but yet so easy to tell a lie?" Oh, the usual reasons: you lack any integrity at all, you don't want to get caught, you like taking advantage of people stupid enough to believe a lie, or in the case of politicians, all of the above.
"Why are we so sleepy in church, but right when the sermon is over, we suddenly wake up?" Well, maybe the preacher is a dull speaker, or your wife forced you to go to church even though there's a game on, or perhaps you don't actually believe in what's being preached and can't wait for it to be over. Me, I bring a good book or science magazine to read while I'm there.
"Why is it so easy to delete a Godly email, but yet we forward all of the nasty ones?" Well, I'm not a Christian, so I'm not interested in your God or your Godly email. And I certainly didn't ask to receive it. But don't feel like I'm picking on your God specifically: I also delete most other forms of spam, too, whether it's someone else trying to sell me something I don't want, some nasty comment, pornography, or politics. I promise not to forward any of the nasty ones I receive, because I don't believe in spamming someone with email they aren't interested in.
"Of all the free gifts we may receive, prayer is the very best one. There are no costs, but wonderful rewards." Hmm. You must be on His divine speed-dial or something, because the only answer I get is silence. I don't even get the courtesy of hearing "I'm sorry, but the answer is no." But if YOU actually get answers to your prayers, please don't let the fact He's snubbing many of the rest of us stop you. I certainly won't hold it against you.
"Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell?" Well, according to Scripture, the world is supposed to go to Hell. At no point does the Bible say that things are ever going to go well on Earth, even for a short while. It says that it's going to get worse until the AntiChrist is born, at which point it will get even worse. All the good people go to Heaven and the Earth is left to rot in its own juices. Personally, I blame the world's current condition on people. There's no need for God to dirty His hands by making the world worse when we're so talented at it ourselves.
"Isn't it funny how someone can say 'I believe in God', but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also 'believes' in God)." Nope, I don't think it's funny at all. Some of the greatest evils in history have been performed by people who claimed to be doing God's work (as if God isn't strong enough to do His own work?). So, when a rabid preacher says that God hates fags, and is willing to destroy an entire nation for allowing gays to even exist, no, I don't find it funny at all. Or a politician says that it's a violation of God's laws for a woman to control her own body, so he writes Man's laws to prevent her. How about the sort of person who claims he's doing good because "It was necessary to destroy the village in order to save it"? "Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through email and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing?" I think it's because one brings joy into many lives, and one is an attempt to pressure people into thinking the same way the writer thinks. All of us love to laugh, but how many of us want someone telling us how awful our lives are because we don't think "the right way" that suits some stranger?
"Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them?" You mean, isn't it funny how I show them the courtesy of respecting their beliefs? Isn't it funny how I won't knowingly send an email they don't want to receive? Isn't it funny how I think that a person's beliefs and convictions should be a private matter, and not force my views on them? Isn't it funny how I think that allowing a multitude of beliefs is part of free will? Isn't it funny how I don't think that there's only one right way to work, or think, or believe? No. I don't think it's funny. What I think is strange is that you DO.
"Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me?" Nope. I think there are few things more cowardly than knowing that you're giving in to peer pressure and doing it anyway. It's as hypocritical as saying "God is love" and then going to protest a heterosexual soldier's funeral in the belief that he died because America doesn't burn gays at the stake. But you needn't worry what I think about you: I don't. So, believe anything you want, in the privacy of your own mind.
"I pray, for everyone who sends this to their entire address book, they will be blessed by God in a special way for them." And I pray that someday, our educational system will once again be respected by the world, instead of being the laughingstock that it is now. I pray that American children will someday learn how to spell, how to punctuate, how to formulate a sentence, and how to ask the right questions. I pray that people learn to reason for themselves instead of following a charismatic leader like sheep. I pray that conservatives stop attacking reality when it refutes their world view. I pray that everyone learns that science and religion are two entirely different fields and stop using one to attack the other, and instead, use each for its best purpose. Science knows nothing about good and evil. Religion knows nothing about how the earth came into being or how animals evolve.
So, I hope you show others the courtesy you did not show me: don't send this email to everyone you think needs to be "converted". If you send it at all, send it only to those who are genuinely interested in hearing more than one point of view. DON'T send it to everyone in your address book: no special blessings will fall from the sky onto anyone's head, let alone yours. Although I do know this Nigerian lawyer who wants you to perjure yourself by claiming that you are a relative of their rich client, so you can help him smuggle huge sums of money out of the country. Perhaps he has some blessing for you when you answer his spam. |
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| Stress, God's way of saying "I'm going to kill you, but I'm going to kill you slowly". |
[Feb. 5th, 2012|11:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | stressed | ] | There has been a lot of fence damage in the last several weeks. At one point, about eighty feet of fence had been simply pulled down, the posts pulled out of the ground and left to lie there.
Two more areas had parts of the fence cut, including one area that had never been hit before.
Maintenance came out and repaired it, and the Tribal Rangers came out and documented it.
I once again put in a request for automated cameras that could at least take still pictures of the intruders, and once again, I was turned down.
I was enraged at the intruders (some of whom also chopped down two trees and removed one of them), and at the boss alike. It costs the same amount of money to buy a game camera as it does for two men from Maintenance to come up here for a single hour. With the repairs that were done to the fence, we could have purchased three such cameras. But no, "cameras are too expensive".
Then my brother Mike gets in touch with me again after ten years. Not surprisingly, he wanted something. What he wanted, though was at least mildly surprising, although I think I guessed even before he got around to it. My estranged mother is dying of lung cancer, and wants to reconcile with me. I've rather enjoyed the peace and quiet of the last eighteen years, so I told him "no".
Unfortunately, Teresa is experiencing a peculiar estrangement from one of her sons right now, and argued the case from that viewpoint. I feel that if I don't at least get in touch with my mother, it will cause Teresa distress.
I don't know how much time she has left, either. Mike is unable to tell me, so it is possible that time will take the decision out of my hands. I confess that I am not very distressed by that idea at all, but it's the lazy way out.
Then, on a routine patrol on Saturday, I discovered our fence vandals were back again. This time, they were apparently enraged by the repairs, because they took wire cutters to nearly every strand at ten foot intervals for nearly a hundred feet. They also dragged three poles out of the ground and hid them. Fortunately, I was able to find the missing poles, as they didn't try very hard.
On impulse, I checked the opposite side of the fence, about a quarter mile away. Yep. Right under the eyes of a stern No Trespassing sign, someone had cut a few wires so they could step over the fence.
I don't know which I find more frustrating: that they're persisting in vandalizing the fence and trespassing on the land, or that it's happening on my watch and I don't even know it until hours or days later.
I do know that I find their contempt for us to be infuriating. It takes an intelligent person to build, but any moron can destroy, and the morons outnumber intelligent people by significant numbers.
At Teresa's suggestion, I ran about seventy rounds through the carbine. I'm underwhelmed by my accuracy, but it was a small enough grouping to be deadly, I suppose. Besides, it's unlikely I'll ever need to shoot anything at that range. At shorter ranges, I can probably hit something as small as a quarter, even with the pistol. If the quarter isn't moving. |
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| The problem with cartoons |
[Jan. 31st, 2012|06:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] | The problem with cartoons is that all of your problems are easily solvable---in the cartoon.
This cartoon has a solution for the problem of OMS. All we have to do is change his life enough that it matches his beliefs and expectations.
Alas, it takes more power than is granted to most mortals to make changes that sweeping. But read the comic anyway: it's funny. |
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| IDIOT! |
[Jan. 15th, 2012|03:29 pm] |
Teresa and I went for a walk yesterday. It's been a dry winter so far, and the plants are drying up a lot. I haven't been here long enough to know if it's more than usual, but there's a reason why this entire region is considered a no-smoking area by the tribe.
So I was absolutely horrified when Teresa found a slightly scorched toy hot air balloon in the middle of a patch of some of our driest vegetation. We don't know where it came from, obviously, but it looks fairly new. It might even have drifted in sometime in the week since I last did a patrol.
There were scorch marks in at least three places on the bag where it seemed to have gotten too close to the heat source, whatever that was.
About the only good thing I can say, besides the fact that a fire did NOT get started, is that the last few days have been relatively windless. This tends to be a windy area, and rugged; the firetrucks would have a terrible time trying to battle a blaze here even on a calm day. And right now, the plentiful dried brush would be just so much tinder to a fire. |
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| Twenty four hours |
[Jan. 9th, 2012|12:44 pm] |
Yesterday, Raymond took us aboard his baby yacht and took us several miles out. There, Teresa and I spread her late husband's ashes.
It was a beautiful day for powered sailing (not much breeze available for wind-powered sailing), and Raymond took us on a tour of the harbor afterward.
Got home after dark and Teresa spotted possible intruders on the property by their head and tail lights. It was a beautiful full moon out, so we grabbed our equipment and went to investigate. We found no intruders, but we did see an area where the barbed wire was cut some time in the last week. Odd, it was only the bottom-most strand. There are other places that don't even have a third strand of wire; why go to all the trouble of cutting a wire?
While chatting with the Rangers today (they came out to photograph the cut wire), I made the mistake of admitting I have depression and that I don't always value my life. I don't know if this will cost me my caretaker job or not. What's done is done, but it preys on my mind. |
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